One and Done

Here I am,  3 weeks and 3 days away from completing my first year of teaching. What. A. Year. It has been a good year, a growing year. I definitely think I have learned way more about myself in the last year than ever, and fully anticipate on doing more of that next year, and the next year, and the next. Every year feels like the "most" year as far as growth though, right?

Well, I can say I have never looked more forward to a coming year before. I think this year, I did a lot of observing. Definitely acted on things; I did not stand still, but I really did a lot of observing. I think I had missed out on that in life (and not in a melodramatic way). I'm transient. A nomad. A gypsy. I had constant change, never settling into one place too long before picking up and going to a new one. I love that and am grateful for it. I have seen/lived in/experienced a lot of America, and the world. I don't feel stuck, or that I am missing out on anything, which is something I feel like a lot of my friends are struggling with. BUT. I didn't invest. I'm ready to invest! Invest my time, my love, my heart, my happiness, my faith, my heartache, my sorrow, my health. I have found things and activities and I am so anxious to start them. I'm feeling good.

Your 20s are awesome. They are so fun. They are so hard. They are so full of lessons, its almost annoying. And remarkably, I'm the FIRST woman in my family to be on my own, not married, no kids, living with girlfriends, straight out of college. Isn't that crazy?? I'm the first one. I'm so current, right? :-) Tangent: can I also just say what amazing roommates I have? Seriously. We are girls. We act like girls. We fight. We get annoyed. But dear Lord, do we love eachother. I would walk through fire for them. They are amazing. And they put up with me. There are qualities in each of them that feed a different part of what I am learning about in life at this stage. God has done me right with these girls.

Speaking of Girls...it is a great show and everyone should watch it.

The Waiting is the Hardest Part

Oh Tom Petty. You are RIGHT. Waiting is hard.

I recently finished a great book called "Cold Tangerines". It is a collection of short stories from the author's life, and she discusses finding the blessings in everyday life. It was incredibly well-written, and uplifting. And comforting. I tried to start her other book last night, but it is more depressing, and I just wasn't feeling it.

Anyway.

She has a chapter on waiting. How we are ALWAYS waiting for something. As babies, we wait to be in elementary school, from there, middle school, then high school. Then see who we become in college, and then who we are after college, then who we are when we are married, then parents, then grandparents, etc.

I am in the after college part. Trying not to feel like I am waiting, but living. The hardest part of this stage is making friends. It is so hard to work up the courage to do it. We cling to who we know in the area, and try and grow from there. And we also forget that those friends are there at all. I sit around feeling lonely, then smack myself in the face and tell myself to reconnect with those people that meant so much to me as College-Katie. That's where I am at now.

Thankfully, I am with a great guy who has helped introduce me to other people, and it is wonderful and helpful, and I have met some amazing people, but alas...they are not MY people. They could gradually become "my" people, but we all know there is a certain amount of pride that comes with this place in life. The pride of creating a life for yourself, including friendships.

So here's to NOT waiting. To living, and to doing, and to creating.